Why keep making friends with my ex?

Why keep making friends with my ex?

At the end of a relationship many times one of the two asks the question: can we still be friends? , although this question is normally asked when the relationship ended on good terms or one of the affected does not want to lose his partner because he is still in love. Remaining friends with your ex can have its consequences, either because there is still love and you will confuse things or because in the future your new partners will feel uncomfortable.

Although there is the possibility that you and your ex are still friends and this is because many consider it an ideal state and it occurs more than anything in courtships that end after many years or marriages, where they do not want to cut the bond of trust they have for each other. There are even many cases in which exes continue to be friends and give each other dating advice or how to handle a situation.

To cite an example of this, in 2017 the Psychology program at the University of Kansas conducted research to determine the reasons why people remained friends after the relationship ended, obtaining as a result that around 60% of individuals decide to maintain a friendship with their former partner for 4 reasons:

  1. Security: Neither of them wants to lose the support and trust they had during the relationship in order to feel more secure in their decisions.

  2. Practicality : This is the case when they are joined by some business, credit or children, so it is better to maintain a friendship when they finish to avoid conflicts or misunderstandings.

  3. Courtesy: Most of all, the relationship is accepted after ending the courtship so as not to hurt the feelings of the other person.

  4. There are still feelings: Although staying friends after the relationship has ended and there is still love is often dangerous, many decide not to pay attention and try.

Remember that if you want to maintain a friendship with your ex-partner , it is necessary that you consult it together, thus avoiding misunderstandings and not confusing things.


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